Did you know arousal rarely starts with your genitals? That’s right, arousal is a full body experience. It’s what gets us in the mood, helps build up sensation, and ultimately leads to mind blowing pleasure.
And we got the juice for you: here are our top arousal tips and tricks, and how you can squeeze out every last drop.
The Anatomy of Arousal
Arousal is just a fancy term for those physiological triggers that take place when we get “turned on” — our body’s way of getting us prepped for sex. Ever feel that tingle on your nipples, perhaps you sweat a little bit, and you get wet? You’re aroused, babe!
Starting from the brain (our largest sex organ) and sending cues to the rest of your body, this aroused state makes you ultra sensitive when it comes to experiencing pleasure. The anatomy of a female arousal teaches us about our bodily cues and functions, states of arousal, and more.
Although we’re all programmed to be aroused, we’re each aroused in a very different way. The way we are touched, talked to, what we see … it’s a long list.
Intention Setting And Communication Are Key for Arousal
Sex and pleasure are far more than just an orgasm; they are the experience you have by yourself or with a partner. Whether you’re exploring arousal with yourself or a partner, intention setting is everything, and the most important of our arousal tips.
Intention setting for arousal with a partner can look like…
- Communicating with your partner what turns you on
- Asking your partner what turns them on
- Understanding what arouses your partner, and what it takes to get them there (time, toys, touch, etc.)
- Carving out quality time to meet your and your partner’s arousal needs
- Being supportive of your partner’s arousal, even if it doesn’t match yours
Intention setting for arousal with yourself can look like…
- Truly making “me” time a priority
- Experimenting to see what arouses you, honoring what works and what doesn’t
- Feeling gratitude for your unique code of arousal
- Riding the waves of arousal: we’re not always down, and that’s okay
Unique ways to explore arousal
After you’ve set some intentions with yourself or with a partner on how to foster arousal, you may be keen to experiment in ways you haven’t tried before. Some more arousal tips to consider:
Abstain from Touch
Sometimes when partner’s feel they need an arousal boost, they think they need to try a myriad of new things but … have they tried abstaining from touch? We’re talking zero physical contact for 2-5 days – and letting that anticipation to touch each other bubble up like lava in a volcano. Once you get to the end of your abstinence period, get ready for the eruption!
Watch your partner masturbate
Visual stimulation is such a powerful tool in our toolbox. In fact, we underestimate just how aroused we can get, even if we have nothing to do with the action at all. Watch your partner masturbate. It’s super hot and you’ll see how they like to be pleasured. Double dip, babe!
Try a new tool
Sex toys & products are simply the fun, fancy tools that can be brought into the bedroom to enhance arousal, connection, and pleasure. Let’s give it a shot! Use products like The WaterSlyde aquatic stimulator or Bomb Balm Arousal Balm – solo or with a partner – for bit of self-care, stimulation, build up, and foreplay all in one.
Talk About Your Fantasies
Fantasies have a special place in our minds: like visual stimulation, they are always there for us to access and get turned on by. While you may not act on your fantasies, it can be super stimulating to swap fantasies with your partner. Who knows, maybe you can role play them together.
Change Your Setting
Get out of your bed and into the wild. It’s time to show your kitchen, your shower, your office, or any suitable place in your home with a functional surface some moving and grooving. Take the “routine” out of pleasure, and have an adventure.
Our genitals are what we first think of as erogenous zones, but there are soooo many more! On your way to genital stimulation, slow it down and enjoy the powerful nerve endings and pleasure the your body’s many erogenous zones. While you may have never heard or attempted some of these zones, we promise that you and your partner will be pleasantly surprised. We recommend trying a couple at the same time!
Inner Wrists & Arms:
Kissing & trailing your fingertips and up and down the arms (and even into the armpits) will send a flush of pleasurable chills.
Back of the Knee:
A wonderful place to trail the fingertips and give a light, stroking touch.
Earlobes deserve more credit, since they are so sensitive! Try gently sucking, caressing, or nibbling on your partner’s earlobes.
There are so many options with nipples, such light (or harder) sucking, kissing, pinching, and even getting adventurous with ice cubes. Try combining nipple stimulation with neck, inner thighs, or ears. Try rubbing on Lovability’s Bomb Balm Arousal Bomb for an icy twist.
Feet stimulation has long been seen as only a fetish, but we can all enjoy it. Ever get very ticklish? It’s because those sensitive nerve endings are firing up! Whether this be a simple foot massage or licking and sucking toes, it’s truly a surprising delight.
If there’s a reason you want to marry your hairdresser every time they wash your hair and run their fingers through it, your partner can do the same. Light caressing or even some hair pulling (from the base) can be super stimulating.
We all have hickey horror stories, but it doesn’t have to be this way! The neck is ultra sensitive (with delicate skin), and is vouched as one of the most sensual areas on the body. Kiss, lick, and lightly nibble.
Making oral sex even more mind-blowing stars with a slooooooow buildup! Work your way up to their genitals by gently kissing or massaging the inner thighs. The tease is to die for!
What’s going to be your first arousal go-to? Any arousal tips you’d like to share? Whether you’re feeling experimental or you know exactly what you like, make you and your partner’s arousal a top priority!